Heading to the Mountains

I am leaving late this morning to go to Cashiers, North Carolina with two of my good friends. Suzanne, Laurie and I are off to Laurie's place in Cashiers. I have never been up there and I hear it is spectacularly beautiful. Suzanne is bringing the food, I am bringing the wine and Laurie is providing the place! Should be a blast. I am looking forward to great friends, great food, great wine and great conversations.

Suzanne and I met Laurie this summer in France. She was one of the yoga instructors who organized the trip. When Suzanne and I first arrived at the train station in Thiviers, Laurie was with Kevin to pick us up. She had gotten there before us and had done some shopping so we had a lovely light dinner on the front porch of the gite! It was awesome. Laurie is fantastic - she's friendly, intelligent, beautiful, personable and funny as hell! We got to spend some time with her before all the other yogis arrived at the Chateau. And it was a lot of fun. Anyway, Suzanne and I both really enjoyed meeting Laurie and are trying to do things with her on a regular basis.

Both Tim and I are trying to get used to him being home full time. I sometimes feel like he thinks he is still living in a hotel - that someone else will take care of the details for him. Unfortunately, the maid stayed at the hotel. I'm just not interested in going back to those responsibilities full time. I think, in all honesty, that as my kids got older, as I went back to school, etc I was really able to get away from all the cooking and cleaning responsibilities - I don't want them back again. It's like I've been given a break from the mundane tasks of meal preparation after 23 years of doing it...and it's nice. I guess I keep thinking that as time passes, Tim will become more accustomed to being home and start to take on some of the responsibilities...maybe?

All this does, however, make me realize that I am not willing to sit around the house any more. I have become more restless as time has passed. For me, home is where my family is and right now they are scattered all over the country and world. So, I am living in this huge house - using 1/3rd of the space and trying to figure out how to travel. It also makes me realize that, even though I did exactly what I wanted to do by staying home and raising our family, that I maybe sold myself short. I am not financially independent - everything I have is because of what Tim has accomplished. My accomplishments have resulted in absolutely no financial gain or security for our family. So, it's creating a level of frustration in my mind. But, it's also got the wheels spinning. What can I do to contribute to the financial security of our family, how can I begin to create a level of financial independence that doesn't rely on Tim. I have a hard time taking money out of our family coffers to travel to Colombia or Malawi...but I don't have money otherwise. I've got to be creative, I've got to figure out how to make Mango Tree a financial reality...somehow, somewhere. I suppose it gives me something to think about.

Had a great conversation with Josh at ONE yesterday. I think he is going to give us a lot of freedom, a lot of flexibility and some access to people at ONE at a higher level - who are working with the same level of people we are.

I'm excited.